Tuesday, May 31, 2011


UNTITLED Chapter 5

People hand in hand
Have I lived to see the milk and honey land ?
Where hates a dream and love forever stands
Or is this a vision in my mind ?

Sunday, May 29, 2011

A Memorial Day Reflection

 Memorial Day is an American holiday that falls on the last Monday of May. It is a day to pay respects to the fallen soldiers that have defended our country. It is also a day to reflect on those that you have lost in your own personal life.

A few weeks ago I heard a song by the group WAR that I’d never heard before. It dredged up so many painful emotions that I literally wept for hours. Even now as I post it to the blog I feel the emotion behind the song so deeply. The losses that we all face in our lives are devastating and heartfelt, but the losses that we face due to death can create so many painful feelings that are difficult to face, at least that is the case for me. 

This being The Memorial Day Weekend, I decided to face some of my own grief (privately—not on the blog).  Sometimes, it seems so much easier to bury it, try to forget it, ignore it…but in the end pain finds its way out. So I decided to look at today as a celebration of beautiful memories instead of blocking them away. I expect I’ll cry a lot but I think that’s why we have a three day weekend…

Saturday, May 28, 2011


UNTITLED chapter 3

Mos Def Kalifornia

They say...
this is the place...where angels congregate...
(I love that)

UNTITLED corrected.

I'm not sure exactly what is going on with blogger but chapter two of Untitled only showed a portion of the chapter. It's nearly three times as long so I reposted it. So lets do this all over again. Sorry for the inconvenience but please go back and check out chapter 1 and chapter 2. Working on chapter 3 now.

UNTITLED chapter 1
UNTITLED chapter 2
UNTITLED chapter 3

Untitled chp 2

I re-formatted chapter 1. I realize that the formatting problems are a distraction from the story. There are still some minor font problems but it shouldn't be quite so distracting. Also, I realize that I'm not quite sure where I ended chapter 1. *blush*

So...you might want to take a quick look at it again. Thanks and sorry for any confusion.

UNTITLED chapter 2

Friday, May 27, 2011

A new novel...but no title

I decided to write a short story back in February. Somehow that has transformed into something much bigger than I had ever anticipated. At this point, I just have to go with the fact that I now have a novel on my hands...with no title.

I always thought that thinking of titles for stories would be the easiest thing. You can tell by some of the titles that I've chosen that this is not the case. Stranded, Beast, MILF, Juicy...On the other hand, Angel over my shoulder, Wheels of Steel and Miscegenist Sabishii were pretty good ones (in my humble opinion).

The story I'm currently at the tail end of is 162K words (and it is not even complete). The average novel starts at 180K. A novella is approximately 160K. I'm not sure how I end up writing myself into a sticky corner but here is my dilemma, other than not having a title.

There is no sex in it yet.

Obviously this is not an erotic story. Second problem;

It has a lot to do with religion and faith and frankly, it doesn't always come out in the best light.

I mean, I'm working against a lot here. I love tackling hard subjects but not sure why I can't just seem to write something easy...

I've only shared this story with one other person and he likes it a great deal, as do I. And in some ways--me liking it is the important thing. Generally if I like it then you guys have liked it as well. I remember when I was writing WOS before anyone ever saw it, I said to HO-Z that no one would get the story. It was going to be too long and the subject matter was very controversial. HO-Z just said fuck what anybody thinks and just write it. So I did. WOS turned out to be maybe my most popular novel.

But if I break WOS down to it's most basic description it is about an angry white guy with cerebral palsy, stricken with daily seizures and a bad attitude that falls in love with his black assistant that is plagued by panic attacks, debilitating shyness, and ulcers. That was just not the formula for the average love story. And yet it worked.

In this story a young black girl is raised in a convent since surviving the Rowanda genocide as a child. She is suddenly thrust into a 'world' that she is poorly equipped for. She falls back on faith, her romantic idealism, and poetic notions when trying to grapple with the world. At the same time there is an older white man that she goes to work for. He is bitter and filled with loss but he also has compassion where she is concerned.

I suppose that the answer to my question (I know I didn't ask one but it is there peeking out of me) is that a story is a journey into each character. If I do my job well then you will experience their highs and lows and therefore, even if there is not any 'action scenes', that is what keeps it going.

But there is only way way to tell if I've succeeded. And that is to post it. So here goes Chapter 1 of


Thursday, May 26, 2011

Introducing Vampiric Charms

Readers wanted!

You may not know that I have a huge love of writing in RP (role-play) with other people. Writing becomes unpredictable when you throw...say 5 other elite writers into the mix. But it's also gloriously fun! And the result can sometimes be a masterpiece of writing.

I believe that me and my friends in Vampiric Charms have achieved that. We have a masterpiece...but no one to read it. We've been writing this story for over a year with no readers, and it's never really bothered us because we write for the love of writing. But hell, here is a perfect venue to share our story. If you're interested we'd sure appreciate your feedback and if you would joint the Vampiric Charms blog.


The story centers around two characters; a black young woman named Miika, and a white young countryboy named Tyr. Their love story goes against society; not because of the racial issue but because Miika is human and Tyr is a werewolf. What further muddies the waters is that Miika had been severly maimed by a werewolf attack as a child. This left the beautiful young girl with ugly scars and a crippled body.

Tyr, a rebellious, lone wolf finds beauty in her and she, in turns, soothes his savage beat. Tyr is broken in many ways himself. He unfortunately has 3 distinct components to his personality; in other words from all outward appearance Tyr has a split personality...

Carlisle is Miika's brother and a sworn enemy of all Inderlanders (non-humans). He is also in a secret vigilante group brought together for the sole purpose of evening out the odds in a very pro human way. No one in their close knit family knows Carlisle's deadly secrets.

Layla is Miika's best friend. Layla also happens to be a witch. Witches are born this way, not turned and she is as mild, strong, and loyal as any person could ever hope to find in a friend. She also has a crush on Carlisle. Unfortunate since Carlisle's pure hatred of Inderlanders (and tolerance of her)

Bridget is Tyr's little sister. She sweeps into town as a whirlwind, unbalancing things along the way, but loyal to her brother and family...a danger to her enemies...


Miika was hurrying to Piscary’s Pizza trying to get there before the sun went down. Human’s frequented the upscale gourmet pizza shop during the day, but at sundown it was almost exclusively an Innlander hangout. Only the bravest of humans, or vampire bait were caught there after sunset. And though the sun was turning dusky in the sky, Miika couldn’t ignore her craving for the Piscary’s Tuscan special; covered in slices of roma tomatoes and with four types of cheese. Four. And no pepperoni grease to muck it up; just the spicy tomato sauce covered in asiago, mozzarella, provolone and aged parmesan, then topped with the succulent tomatoes.

Miika had quickly parked her car and was hurrying into the restaurant as a human couple was leaving. The woman called out to her.

“Honey the sun is almost down-“

“I’m not going to be long!” She hurried quicker, barely using her cane, her need for pizza apparently out weighing her need for safety.

“A Tuscan special!” Miika called out before she even reached the bar where you placed your carryout orders. The bartender was a witch that knew her as one of the few humans who would be caught with tomato pizza. She wasn’t easy to forget; pretty face, dark eyes, caramel skinned and with an ugly hump, a clawed hand and a freakish limp.

The bartender was kind enough to put a rush on her order. Still it would be full dark before she left with it…Miika sat back in her barstool and tried to relax while she ignored the curious looks of a table of Vampires. She knew they were trying to figure out if she was there for the thrill of being bitten, but she figured that if she ignored them, they in turn would ignore her.

A blonde man sat at the end of the bar. He was drinking a beer and minding his own business. She noticed him because he was a huge man; werewolf she figured, and wearing nice tight jeans…

A rowdy group of vampires came in and Miika tried not to tense. Vampires smelled that and it was considered an aphrodisiac. They ignored her after a cursory glance. It was widely known that to start any trouble with any humans on the premises would bring the wrath of the vampire owner. You had to have a special license to serve humans and Innlanders in one establishment and one infraction would cause him to loose that license. No Innlander wanted to be on the receiving end of his wrath should that happen.

Miika noticed the Vampires eyeing the werewolf. As they passed him one young vamp bumped into him roughly causing the Werewolves beer to spill. After that things happened very fast. The blonde man stood, looking even more scrumptious then he was sitting. His long blonde hair was tied at the nape of his neck and he had a neat beard a shade darker then the hair on his head.

It was obvious that he was giving the Vamp an opportunity to apologize but the younger man snickered to the rest of his group. He made the mistake of taking his eyes from the blonde man whose fist came out impossibly fast to connect to the vamp’s nose.

Damn, werewolves moved fast! She’d never seen one in action. The bartender came running out from behind the bar, his eyes like saucers. “Miss you better leave.” He was trying to take hold of her arm but Miika was frozen to the spot.

The vampires surrounded the angry blonde man. “Do something.” Miika cried out to the bartender. Those Vamps would kill him…

But movements that were like blurs to Miika’s human eyes showed quite the contrary. The blonde man’s fists kept landing and vampires kept flying; soaring through the air like they were being pulled by invisible wire. 

Read more at Vampiric Charms! This is a role-play group based on the works of Kim Harrison and her Hollows series.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

To be invisible
Will be my claim to fame
A girl with no name
That way I won't have to feel the pain
Just a plain old human being
Today don't mean a thing
In a world that's so mean

A world that seems not for me
So privately
I'll be invisible
That way I won't have to explain a thing
If you know what I mean
I won't even have to be here on the scene

It's so ridiculous
But the strife and the bliss
Will go right on through
Right on through me
To have missed

All the things that hurt your soul
No one would ever know
They'd never know
Life so preciously
Just don't seem to be
As free as they claim freedom to be
Things are going fast
To have found that all is in the past
To have to take what you can get
Sure can make a heart upset

I must behave myself
For somebody else
Who may have a little fame, fortune or wealth

So I'll be invisible

~Curtis Mayfield

Monday, May 23, 2011

The reason I write

I received an e-mail through Literotica today. I'm blessed to have people that want to read what I write. I suppose in some ways that is the payment I desire. Not saying that it wouldn't hurt to actually make money at something that I enjoy doing. But I do this for the love of writing...just like the majority of us writers on Literotica and other free sites.

Every time I read a helpful, positive, email it just solidifies the love I have for words. But sometimes I get a comment that moves me to near tears and I'm going to share this one. I've withheld her name for privacy.


I have never commented or contacted an author of any kind no matter how wonderful I think they are. But a very good friend encouraged me to share my comments and more importantly my compliments with you. Like many of your readers I have searched for stories that reflect my life and personal experiences which has been extremely difficult for what I suspect are some of the reasons you have created your stories. Because of my line of work and where I live I never discuss anything about myself but have found so many parallels in your stories that I think you might even be surprised. So having prefaced my reasons with you please let me share with you my story and how much your writing has meant to me.

I live in Northern Italy where I have been for the last five years. I live there with my husband and two of five children. We have been in Europe a total of twenty years and one of our most memorable assignments was in Lajes Field, Azores. We adopted our eldest daughter from a small orphanage in Angra. So you can imagine my surprise when you had a character from those very islands (no one even knows where they are). I loved your use of Portuguese, it was wonderful to hear the language in a story.

My husband is in the Air Force and just happens to be tall (however not quite as built as your characters) but with red hair and freckles. Again the similarities have been surprisingly special.

As for me I am the poster child for one of your characters, short, caramel skin and a little rounder than I would like but where it gets really interesting is this: Your characters have literally saved my life. After reading Wheels of Steel I realized I had some of the same symptoms as Robin. So, I saw a doctor who confirmed I had IBS. Last week following my graduation from university I got sick again. After visiting the dr. again I found out among other things that I am a diabetic. So when I read your last story I was blown away.

I am writing to you because tomorrow I will have surgery and it is important to me to let you know how much your writing has meant to me. It is nice to not only be able to read love stories with people that look like me and my wonderful husband. Now that I have finished school I am thinking of writing something other than term papers and dissertations. You have been a profound inspiration and I thank you.

Grazie Mille!

Becoming a published writer is important, but not as important as touching people like this. This is what I love about writing!

Corrected Beast chapter 15

I corrected chapter 15 of Beast. There were a few words out of place or missing all together. There are no other changes other than the Authors note that I placed at the end of the story. It will appear in the Literotica version which I submitted this morning.

Author's note: I wanted to thank you for your comments, encouraging words and helpful hints. In no way should this story be considered factual in reference to Homeland Security, The Marines, diabetes, cleft palates etc. It is merely a work of fiction. If I've written anything that is inaccurate about any of these subjects then chalk it up to my own vivid imagination. In other words; I just made this stuff up, folks. The only thing not made up is Cobb Hill mountain in Estill County and the Furnace with the goats.


I'm including some information about the Fitchburg Furnace. We visited it several times when I went to Cobb Hill to visit Keith's Aunt Edith and Uncle Ray and cousin Sue and lots more people. Uncle Ray did die and was buried in the white cemetery and Aunt Edith moved out of the beautiful A frame house and up to Covington. During the family reunion I was the only black person on Cobb Hill and I wasn't allowed to go off by myself--not because of the wildcats but because I might get shot by a redneck.

I believed that wildcats looked like cougars up until yesterday when I did research on it and saw that they were nothing more than bigger house cats. And no, I never had sex in the woods. LOL

Fitchburg Furnace

Sunday, May 22, 2011

BEAST chapter 15

Beast Chapter 15

The Lady Sings the Blues

This movie was made in 1972, I was seven years old when I first watched this scene. I've seen it no less than 20 times and I STILL scream and blush when Billy D Williams says, "Do you want my arm to fall off?" I would say that he is more than likely the very first man that I ever fell head over heels in love with...well with the exception of my cousin Eugene. I had the biggest 7 year old non-sexual crush on Eugene!!!

Friday, May 20, 2011

Judgement Day May 21st

I am so annoyed that tomorrow is Judgment Day and I already filled up my gas tank. It cost me $50 and I only have a midsized car! Not that I'm going anywhere. So those of you who will be remaining here on earth along with me, I think we should prepare ourselves for the inevitable ruckus. I'm assuming that the 'Rapture' will create all kinds of problems and confusion. The Center for Disease Control in Atlanta has issued some guidelines in case of a Zombie Apocalypse (link included).

I'll cover some of the finer points of survival in the event that there is a mass Zombie uprising. This is not my information, mind you, but comes directly from the CDC in Atlanta website posted by Ali S Khan.

There are all kinds of emergencies out there that we can prepare for. Take a zombie apocalypse for example. That’s right, I said z-o-m-b-i-e a-p-o-c-a-l-y-p-s-e. You may laugh now, but when it happens you’ll be happy you read this, and hey, maybe you’ll even learn a thing or two about how to prepare for a real emergency.
Below are a few items you should include in your kit, for a full list visit the CDC Emergency page.
  • Water (1 gallon per person per day)
  • Food (stock up on non-perishable items that you eat regularly)
  • Medications (this includes prescription and non-prescription meds)
  • Tools and Supplies (utility knife, duct tape, battery powered radio, etc.)
  • Sanitation and Hygiene (household bleach, soap, towels, etc.)
  • Clothing and Bedding (a change of clothes for each family member and blankets)
  • Important documents (copies of your driver’s license, passport, and birth certificate to name a few)
  • First Aid supplies (although you’re a goner if a zombie bites you, you can use these supplies to treat basic cuts and lacerations that you might get during a tornado or hurricane)
Once you’ve made your emergency kit, you should sit down with your family and come up with an emergency plan. This includes where you would go and who you would call if zombies started appearing outside your door step. You can also implement this plan if there is a flood, earthquake, or other emergency.
    Photo: Family members meeting by their mailbox. You should pick two meeting places, one close to your home and one farther away.
    Family members meeting by their mailbox. You should pick two meeting places, one close to your home and one farther away.
  1. Identify the types of emergencies that are possible in your area. Besides a zombie apocalypse, this may include floods, tornadoes, or earthquakes. If you are unsure contact your local Red Cross chapter for more information.
  2. Pick a meeting place for your family to regroup in case zombies invade your home…or your town evacuates because of a hurricane. Pick one place right outside your home for sudden emergencies and one place outside of your neighborhood in case you are unable to return home right away.
  3. Identify your emergency contacts. Make a list of local contacts like the police, fire department, and your local zombie response team. Also identify an out-of-state contact that you can call during an emergency to let the rest of your family know you are ok.
  4. Plan your evacuation route. When zombies are hungry they won’t stop until they get food (i.e., brains), which means you need to get out of town fast! Plan where you would go and multiple routes you would take ahead of time so that the flesh eaters don’t have a chance! This is also helpful when natural disasters strike and you have to take shelter fast.
Never Fear – CDC is Ready
Photo: Get a Kit, Make a Plan, Be Prepared
Get a Kit, Make a Plan, Be Prepared
If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (including isolation and quarantine). It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated. Not only would scientists be working to identify the cause and cure of the zombie outbreak, but CDC and other federal agencies would send medical teams and first responders to help those in affected areas (I will be volunteering the young nameless disease detectives for the field work). To learn more about what CDC does to prepare for and respond to emergencies of all kinds, visit:

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Memphis Soul

I didn't know just how much I liked Memphis soul until a friend from the blog began sending me links to some cool music. Now I've found myself addicted to the slow sultry music. I'm ashamed to say that I don't think that I've ever even heard the name Booter T Jones but some of you might. This is a link to his newest album. It is very good! Thanks again Ben.

Booker T Jones -The Road From Memphis

Pep's ex

While on the internet and reading blogs I realized that a lot of people have an 'about me' page. Well I don't have that because I tend to share a lot of personal information as I blog. Some things I don't talk about is friends, siblings, co-workers, and exes. Once that's in the universe you can never take it back so it's best not to even go there.

But I decided that I'm going to bend that rule a bit and show a video of one of my best friends, who also happens to be my ex. Sometimes it happens that you can break up with a person and form an even greater bond as a friend rather than as a lover.

Anyways, my ex is a stand-up comic and I decided to share his act. He would probably shit since this video is a year old and he's dropped his weight. But I think he's tremendously funny--though this is not one of his best bits. Also he has a very dirty mouth so make sure no kiddies are around. Enjoy.


BEAST chapter 14

BEAST chapter 14

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

More questions, Yay!

"My questions is what's the state of They Say Love is Blind contest winner update?"

I pushed back They Say Love is Blind (henceforth known as TSLB) to finish writing what has turned in to a novel length story -- which then got pushed back to finish Beast. Once Beast is finished I go back to the unfinished novel AND THEN TSLB. Whew...not sure when that will be finished but definitely before the end of the year. Okay before we reach fall. I have like...one sentence written and only a portion of the plot worked out. I just want to make sure it's awesome and so won't rush it.

"...have you seen 1Girl 5Gays on Logo? good show.. my new addiction"

I caught the promo for the show about a year ago but forgot to actually watch it. What's Logo? Is that the channel it shows on? We don't have that channel here in Cincinnati. I'll watch it when I find it. The show sounded really interesting.

Monday, May 16, 2011

More questions for Pep

Yay, got more questions to answer. 

"Does That Make Me Gay? is really interesting, will you ever do more with it? Is that your only gay/lesbian story?"

I really had fun writing Does That Make Me Gay? For one I enjoyed writing it as interactive with the pictures. It reminded me of my time writing in role play groups. Does That Make Me Gay? is my first time writing in the lesbian genre but it won't be my last. I would actually enjoy continuing their storyline. I worried that I would make some angry since one of the characters spends much of the story thinking that she is crushing on a guy before realizing that it is a girl.

I'm incredibly interested in writing gay male stories. I did the most awesomely sexy gay RP with one of my writing buddies in an RP called Fifth Avenue (If you want to read it I posted the entire RP on the blog and it's contained in chapter 3--good luck finding it though :).  I always jump at writing the male roles. I sometimes think that I should have been born a gay male :)

Okay, next question;

"My question is when will the next part of Beast be up? I'm checking back all day everyday lol. You have us hooked" 

I actually intend to have something for you guys Tuesday. I didn't write any of the story last week. I didn't realize that my addiction to Liptons Iced Tea with citrus would result in withdrawals when I ran out of the stuff...But anyways once my nausea and headaches went away then I developed the toothache. Both problems have been rectified! Now back on track!

Any more questions?  None? Aww...

Question to Pep

Blogger went down a few days ago and I missed some questions, comments, feedback. If I missed anything please be sure to resubmit. Also, I read my emails and such over my phone where I can't respond until I get home later in the evening. Every once in a while I'll forget that I haven't responded to a question. Believe me when I say that I'm not ignoring you or don't want to answer questions. I live for questions!

Someone asked one and I forgot to respond so here it is.

"Will there be a sequel to The Way Home?"

Unfortunately if I did a sequel I could never do much with it because I can't do anything with The Way Home. When I wrote it, I wasn't writing it with the thought that it would be read. I wrote it just for the sake of writing. I wrote it to satisfy my own curiosity about these characters--if that makes sense at all. The story deals with first love between two teens under the age of eighteen and because a very important portion of the story involves the two having sex I can't use this story anywhere. It wasn't even a good idea for me to post it on the blog. But it is one of my very favorites. My friend JG did the editing and when it was done I think we both said too bad we can't do anything with the story.

I don't really want to change it, either. I don't want to take out the love scene, or make them older so...I'm kind of stuck. This is truly art for the sake of art...I wrote it because I had to and it was never going to go anywhere. Though most of us will read the story and see in it the innocence of first time love...others might use it to feed into a dark and sick nature. So no sequel to The Way Home. Thanks for asking. Did I miss anyone elses question?

Friday, May 13, 2011

Kraftwerk/Eleanor Rigby mash-up

Pulling my own tooth

Ohhhhh...the agony of a toothache. It's like...why call it a toothache when your entire head freaking hurts??? Several months ago I broke a tooth. Yeah, I know...months ago. I broke it in half and it really hurt. Well just 4 or 5 months before I had a molar pulled. It hurt so bad that I was in the dentist office screaming.

Now mind you that I have an incredibly high tolerance of pain. I don't mind needles, bee stings, I've had chronic back pains, etc. I even broke my ankle when I was 8 mos pregnant with my daughter. The surgeon scheduled me for surgery and I told him that I refused to take anesthesia or to be put to sleep. I told him that I broke it w/o anesthesia--you can fix it w/o anesthesia. The nurse was in the room and said, 'But you don't understand--' but the doctor interrupted her and told her that I could just get an epidural; which is what you normally get when you have a baby anyways, and it would numb me from the waist down. I was in a wheelchair for three days, wearing a splint on a broken ankle while I waited for surgery. No painkillers.

The surgeon told me to bring headphones to surgery so that I wouldn't hear when he re-broke the bone and began drilling the screws. He put up a big tent so that I wouldn't see what he was doing. Silly me, I was amused when I felt him put all of his weight on my ankle and it broke...again.  I was amused again when I heard the drill and felt the vibration in my body as he screwed the plate into place...

But when the surgery was over a nurse came up to me and stabbed me in the leg with syringe on the sly. I was so 'outraged' as I yelled at her and demanded to know what she'd given me. A cocktail of morphine, demerol and...something else...it now escapes me. Well I was out cold within minute.

Gee, I never really thought about what I'd feel like AFTER the surgery. Within minutes of regaining consciousness I was buzzing the nurse and begging for drugs. I do mean beg. I said please. No...I said PLEASE!!! She said No. That woman made me wait 15 minutes for drugs. Silly me.

So back to the Dentist. I know that it shouldn't hurt when you have a tooth pulled. But I guarantee you that he hadn't given me any anesthesia even though he shot me 8 or more times. I'm convinced that he hurt me purposely. Anyways, it was the worst experience and since then I haven't been able to get the courage to go back. So it's been about 8 months and the tooth is practically wiggling in the socket.

I just want to pull it.

So today I made all of the preparations for self surgery.

1. brush teeth
2. Lysterine to disenfect
3. Novacaine
4. painkillers--no vicodin so Advil
5. 3 shots of cherry vodka chased with some Pepsi Cola
6. Strip off clothes...though this part is a bit unclear. It seemed right at the time.
7. Take picture of loose tooth...still unclear why. Again seemed like a good idea at the time.
8. Brush teeth again, more Lysterine, more Novacaine, another shot of cherry vodka (but this time on the rocks. And listen to some music and dance in underwear.)
9. Pull up information on the internet advising why you should not pull out your own teeth.
10. chicken out and blog about it.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Pregnancy in eroticism

Perhaps I'm not really a writer of erotic literature. Maybe I'm a writer or romance stories with an erotic injection. In erotica the hero doesn't get pregnant. In romance we see love bloom and a family completes the perfect picture.

When I was writing Beast I had no intentions of creating a baby...as a matter of fact I've been keeping a tally of my stories so that I don't fall into a trend of ending a story with a pregnancy. In my reality, getting pregnant would not be a happily ever after. In my romances getting pregnant was like...oh shit. I'm happy to have my children but I'm just saying...

So why do readers like to see the hero get pregnant? When I submitted the updates on TST many people were hoping Ashleigh would get pregnant because Chris wasn't wearing a condom, even though I explained that she was on birth control. I went with it and understand in this particular fairy tale it would be a great ending since Chris had always been alone. He would make a great father and I guess I am Chris' fairy godmother in that I can create a happily ever after that includes a family.

But what of other erotic stories? Do we really want to see our heroine become pregnant in the middle of all this hot sex? I have another story in which pregnancy factors in to it and now I'm like...crap, I've written too many pregnancy stories. LOL.

Well, when I write the next fairytale no one gets pregnant! Though that won't be likely since it will be a gay-male rendition of Goldilocks and the three bears...

Monday, May 9, 2011

Why aren't there men like Christopher (BEAST) in real life?

Once upon a time there was a man named Harry. He was like...6'5", 400 lbs with a huge tumor on his head that continued to grow until it looked like a baby elephant snout. He smelled and sometimes his pants wouldn't be completely zipped because his zipper had busted out long ago. Harry was mean and kind of an asshole. He was the kind of stinky man that didn't care what others thought...even when it was summer time and he was 'ripe' and he hadn't bathed in weeks...perhaps months. Once, Harry even had phone sex in his cubicle across from mine. (Yes, I was very unlucky to have to sit across from stinky Harry--especially in the summer).I heard him whispering, 'what are you wearing?' I was like...oh my god...

Then there was a lady named Neko who was half Japanese and half black. Neko was very beautiful. She was six feet tall and could have been a model with her rail thin body and perfect face. Well Neko was new to the work group and she and Harry became best friends. At lunch she would be the only one to sit next to Harry...she would even bring him food. Harry stopped being an asshole.

I watched Neko and Harry. I used to avoid Harry like everyone else. When I saw how Neko could be friends with him I became ashamed of myself. I began to go up to Harry and ask him questions--because Harry was also the most knowledgeable person in our workgroup. He knew EVERYTHING. I began to bring him food too. Once I bought him half a pumpkin pie and a can of whipped cream. His eyes glazed. I had a new friend for life.

One day Harry got fired. It was inevitable. He used to steal people's food out of the refrigerator and he was found sleeping half naked on the floor of the office after hours. Also sometimes his pants would fall down and his 'winky' would show since he went commando.

By this time...guess what? Everybody loved Harry. Want to know why? Because once we took the time to get to know him we found that he was a good guy. You see Harry was lonely and had a girlfriend. We'll call her Golddigger; Goldie for short. Goldie lived in a different town and sometimes she would call in through the toll free number to speak to him. Goldie took all of Harry's money--every bit of it. He couldn't pay his rent, got evicted and ended up staying in the office after hours; hence stealing food, and smelling bad.

So, back to the question; Why aren't there men like Christopher in real life.

Guess what? There are. Their names are Harry, and Mike and Joe. Here is another question; are you willing to step up to the plate and be friends with someone like that?

How much does physical appearance matter to you? Don't get me wrong, we are all drawn to things that are aesthetically pleasing. Yes, I get giddy at the sight of muscular abs and nice sexy arms. But when it comes time to select a love interest, looks are very very low on the totem pole for me.

Don't take that to mean that I've lowered my standards. They are actually pretty high. But I know that looks fade or they transform into something totally brand new once you get to know a person. The prettiest person can become ugly if they are ugly on the inside...and vice versa.

Personally, I find beauty in the strangest things. Harry never appealed to me on a romantic basis--but I found a good friend in him.

My point is this; if you take the time to get to know someone that might not initially appeal to you--not even with the intent of falling in love...I'm talking just opening yourself up to meeting and being friendly with ALL people, then you might be surprised at who truly turns out to be beautiful to you.

Does it make you shallow if you bypass that person; the one that wasn't the most handsome or the most popular? I don't think that makes you shallow at all. I think it makes you ordinary; it makes you like everybody else.Challenge yourself to be more than ordinary.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

BEAST chapter 13

Hi everyone. I was able to tackle chapter 13. I was hoping to have something to post today but didn't want to make any promises. Enjoy!

BEAST Chapter 13

Beast-Literotica links

I've been asked for the best way to begin reading the most current version of BEAST from beginning until...my stopping point. The best thing to do is to start with Literotica. The version that you will find on the blog or at TST have been made before I began 'tweaking' and they are going to be eventually removed.

I'll post links to each Literotica chapter of Beast as they appear. Once you get to the end of the Literotica submissions then switch to the blog re-edits. Thanks for giving the story a second look. And again, if you don't want to read the re-edits that is fine, too. The changes don't effect the storyline. It only adds more information and expands their romance by about another month.

Someone asked about a time line and I added it into the re-edit. In the original version they had only been dating a week when he had to ship out. I expanded their relationship so that it is now 1 1/2 later that he actually ships out.

Beast chp. 1
Beast chp. 2
Beast chp. 3
Beast chp. 4
Beast chp. 5

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Beast re-edits chapters 10, 11 & 12

Okay, rolled up the remaining re-edits into one post. Please ignore the highlights, the change in fonts, the line breaks. They don't signify anything but a means for me to locate where I am in the manuscript. The next post will be all new material.

Beast re-edits chapter 10-12

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The re-edits for Beast

First let me just thank you for providing your opinions on whether or not this story should be re-edited. I had decided that I saw room for improvements, and it is time to reveal them. I'm still plodding forward and haven't reached chapter 12 but there is plenty of new stuff covered in these revised chapters.

To make things easier for those that have no interest in reading these chapters just to see the changes, I've included a very brief synopsis. They are spoilers so if you are going to actually read the re-edits be fore-warned.  

Also, I've tweaked this entire story from beginning to end. One of the things that I tweaked has to do with the terrorism story line and Osama Bin Laden's capture and execution. The full re-edited story will appear on Literotica.

I want to briefly mention the stats to this blog. Yesterday there were 2,014 views. Today, thus far, there are 1,662. Do you guys know why there are so many? Because of refreshing the page. LOL! Thanks for checking back so much! You are the best readers that any author could hope to have. Please enjoy the updates!

Chapter 8
-In this chapter Ashleigh and Christopher have just left his parent's house for Sunday dinner. Back at Ashleigh's apartment they give in to passion. Christopher reveals to his team that he now has a girlfriend...and they are crude as they good naturedly give him a hard time. Ashleigh makes him dinner and he sees a picture of DeAngelo for the first time and feels insecure about his looks. Ashleigh proves her love to him and later he confronts his sister and demands she respect his relationship. Feeling like everything is finally perfect in her world, Ashleigh is shocked to learn that Kendra doesn't think she and Christopher are a good match. She walks out of the office and straight to a vending machine where she binges on candy. She goes back up to the office feeling calmer and confronts her friends. Meanwhile, Christopher has watched on the monitors and after seeing the way she ate the candy is now concerned. During dinner he gives her an opportunity to come clean about sneaking the candy--instead she lies. The lie concerns Christopher, yet he doesn't tell her he knows. After making love he gets out of bed to workout and Ashleigh watches since he has agreed to do it in the nude. The chapter ends with Christopher realizing that love creates worry; worrying about Ashleigh's health, worrying about DeAngelo coming back into her life and worrying about the lie she told him. End chapter 8

Chapter 9
-In this chapter Ashleigh and Christopher go to the Madd Crab with Ashleigh's friends and form a budding friendship. And then Lance and the girls are attacked by redneck bullies. Feeling partially responsible, Christopher swears that he will always protect her and she assures him that she knows he will always be there for her. For the first time he worries and wonders what if he isn't always there. The two attend Sunday dinner at the Jameson's house again which is uneventful other than Alma's apology under Christopher's watchful eyes. Ashleigh yearns for a family like Christopher's instead of her family that is spread out. Feeling that he might want to marry Ashleigh, Monday morning Christopher speaks to his Commander and requests to be taken off the roster to perform Special Missions. His Commander tries to talk him out of it but he tells him that he has found something that he loves more than being a Marine. The two decide to keep it a secret until Christopher has found another job and can be reassigned, fearing that the rest of the team will be hostile to him. And just as things are going well, Christopher learns that they are going out on a mission and as he has not found a new job he is included. He takes Ashleigh to dinner and reveals this to her. End chapter 9

Sunday, May 1, 2011

show me how the piggies eat...

I made meatloaf for dinner today. My daughter goes; "Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf!" So I say; "Show me how the piggies eat." And then hilarity ensues...

Ho-Z Design YouTube video and Pep's Interview

check out this very cool slide show video of Ho-Z's art. EmpressRi uploaded it to YouTube and it can be found on her page.

Here is the direct link to EmpressRi's YouTube of the video. Be sure to check out her page. Ho-Z designed it and it is very cool looking! His store is not quite opened for business but he is still taking orders for projects. He did the design for EmpressRi's YouTube page and he's working on a custom art piece for me, not to mention other things.

Recently I did an interview with Ho-Z. Because of Wheels of Steel and because he's one of my best friends, you guys have seen his name pop up plenty here on the blog. He's been getting lots of hits on his page, as well and has made some other good friends of people from this blog. He also has something that he calls ANTS; people who help him with things that he has particular difficulty with like with language or writing or whatever. I guess I'm a big Ant! LOL. Here are some of the questions that he gets asked:

Q: Where are you from?
A: Norway

Q: Tell us about yourself.
A: "left-handed brainiac" - EmpressRi
Best line ever to describe me and my determination. I was 14 when I discovered the tools, after that it has been a race against time to be as unique as possible. Yeah, Mr.Yancey, I see you. RIP 

Q: Tell us about your art: music, writing, etc.
A: My art is all based on photo manipulation, therefore it is a pain to get clearance from people other than the models that do nude modeling. For whatever reason they seem to have a thing for my style of work. Interesting isn't it? The music is just a hobby, nothing big just fun. WOS was one hell of a ride, and I'm not sure you are ready for a new one, Pep, so I'm just cooking a new one until someone has the motivation to go for it.

Q: Tell us about Ho-Z Design and the logo
A: A hobby thing that looks like something more as we speak. My goal is to show that different is not negative. Some comments I've received about the logo has been why do I disrespect people with disabilities, and I've been like, WHAT?

My idea for it was to be proud if the disability, and not disrespectful. For me it’s like a question; Do you dare to be different and stand up for yourself?

YES... I’m disabled and have CP, and it’s a part of me, but let's butt it on its head, and look how open, creative and a bit crazy it can turn me into, to have limitations. By taking a well-known symbol and turn it around, I feel I can represent me as an artist/designer at his best.That is the logic behind it, so now you have a reason to rock the T-shirts as well; it’s not just cool, but a lot more!

"Yo stop frontin and use your head" – KRS ONE

Q: What are your plans for the future?
A: Get the store for prints up and running (see any art you want to buy? Pre-order prints by e-mailing me at hoz@hozdesign.com), expand the services I can help with. Build a network of "ants" to help run the daily promotion work around the world.

Q: Are you single? Not asking for myself, mind you--but people do ask. (He is blushing furiously at this question)
A: Status: mmmm, what can I say, these readers sure do have a lot on there minds, that I ever hear? 
But seriously why do someone want to know the status of me, the silent jazz cat in the corner? Ok, let me ask you this, what can you do that will spark my creativity? (challenge for all of you that did not have the nerves to ask me) Game on!

Q: Will you be in the states anytime soon?
A: I'm planning to go there soon, and will bring some new stuff with me… 

Thanks PEP, and be sure to click the 'Like' button for Ho-Z Design in the sidebar. All you blue birds(tweet tweet) can follow me at @hozdesign.Want to be an ant? You are more then welcome to, or want custom art, preorder prints email me at hoz@hozdesign.com.  See you all over at www.hozdesign.com for nice chat and an artistic journey.


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