The uncut version of Juicy

JUICY; the novel had over 3,300 views. That was in just about 26 hours. Amazing. Some of you have undoubtedly noticed a change. Anonymous wrote:

Pepperpace, I love your work. I read all your stories multiple times and both Juicy stories, on Literotica and the full version here. I did notice you deleted a couple of parts: after the obgyn saw her and Juicy says "WTF kind of remedy is this!" and when Juicy punched Troy in the eye after he came back. I loved/laughed at both of these parts and thought this expounded on Juicy's character. Did you alter this to change Juicy's character?
Thanks, Admirer of you work.

While I prepared the novel for submission to a publishing company that requested the full manuscript, one of the requirements for them to accept it was that there be no lewd sex acts and that the language had to be mild cursing only. So you may have noticed that the descriptive sex was removed and Juicy's language was...mellowed out some. For instance, she says 'flipping' instead of fucking.

This was incredibly difficult for me. The sex provides an intimate picture of their characters and I found it to be important to the story--same with the the cursing.   

So, had this been published in the traditional way, then this is the novel that you would read in print. Fortunately for us all, I intend to e-publish the novel which will include all of the descriptive sex and all of the cursing. 

So technically there are two versions of Juicy; the Harlequin romance version (which is the one you've read) and the hardcore version (which is the one that will be e-published)

I'm happy that you got a chance to read this version of the novel because I doubt that this version will ever go to print. I'll certainly keep you posted on when it is published and I appreciate all of the comments and feedback!

Pep

JUICY; the novel

will be on sale soon.

Friday June 17th JUICY; the novel will post for 24 hours.

The blog has grown by leaps and bounds and we have over 150 followers (though I realize there are more who aren't registered followers but that still stop by on a regular basis). 

As promised, the entire novel will go up for 24 hours starting Friday at 6 pm est. It will remain until Saturday at 6pm est. (or slightly after depending on when I get back from the mall). Hopefully that will give more people time to see this post. Feel free to download it, save it, share it, share a link but PLEASE do not repost it. If for some reason you miss it...lets say because you didn't see this post until Sunday, what you can do is reach out to another follower who saved it and request that they send you the file. If you ask me I will say, 'it will be on sale soon.'

Thanks guys,
Pep

148 blog friends and my thank you gift to you

I think that is just dynamite! 148 followers since my first post October 27, 2009. Athenai and Ben were the first two people to ever leave a comment. As I post this, Beast chapter 10 continues to sit in the number 1 position on Literotica for all times. 

I remember first coming to Literotica for the sheer purpose of browsing the interracial category. I found some of the most awesome writers and was amazed that I had access to hundreds upon hundreds of free stories. I felt like I had died and gone to heaven. I wasn't even thinking about posting any of my stories. I was content to just read. Nerd4music was my first favorite author and I began to read her works voraciously. Then I discovered that she had a blog on blogspot and I began following that religiously. 

One thing led to another and I nervously submitted my first story and was surprised when I received so much positive feedback. And the first time I checked the Top List and searched for my story and found myself nestled comfortably in spot 54 I was so ecstatic! You would have thought that I had become published! I looked at these other writers and thought, man they must be so proud to be in that elusive number 1 spot. Now I will tell you what it feels like; like a dream or maybe the best fantasy. 

The only problem is that I wanted to have a dialogue with the readers, which is not possible on Literotica. And now, nearly 2 years later here I am. Obviously, my blog is what helped me to get there because it gave you all a voice.

So in appreciation, I'm going to do something that I said I would not do. I'm going to give you all JUICY; the novel. When I hit 150 followers, I will post the novel on the blog for 24 hours only. And then I will never never bring it back. Only one person besides myself has ever seen the completed work. But since my plans are now to e-publish, JUICY is soon going to be sold along with some other new works...like Urban Vampire Chapter 3.

It looks like I'm going with Smashwords as it will be fully accessible on B&N and Amazon, so Kindle and Nook users will both be able to get it. 

So, again, I give thanks to you all for taking the time to read my stories, listen to my ramblings, and help me to dispel my self doubts.

Thank you,
Pep

Happy Birthday Son!!!

Today is my son's 19th birthday! There were certainly times when I didn't think that I'd get to this point of my life; having an adult child that is making his own decisions about the directions of his own life. Most people do this type of reflection on their child's 18th birthday. But I have to admit that I spent that day counting down the months until he moved out and went off to college.

Now, a year later I can really appreciate both of our accomplishments; me and my son's. It was not easy. There was the time that he dropped his television set out of his bedroom window. There was the time that he knocked out three windows playing baseball. Three. And the time that he snuck in my vodka, puked under his bed and pretended like he didn't know why his bedroom smelled bad.

But there is also blessings; gifted classes, Merit Scholarship Nominee, his band playing in Carnegie Hall, flying to London to march in the London Day Parade and just being a son that any mother would be proud to have. 

Here I am 19 years ago telling my sister to take the picture now. I wanted a picture of myself while having a contraction. Notice the forced grin and the tightening fists. You can't see the buttocks clenched in agony...but it's there.

He really was the cutest baby that I'd ever saw. Men would come up to me all of the time and say, "Wow that's a cute baby." And my toddler son would say, "Daddy?" He called every man Daddy. It got old after a while...believe me.

All Little boys want to be Superman. My Mom put the tape there.

Then began his baseball days...and the beginning of my many broken windows.

His first tux, but not his last. His band required him to have a tux throughout High School.

He went to California to stay with family for the summer all by himself. Had no worries about flying on a plane.

Now he's a college man, living away from home.He listens to jazz while he's doing his homework. Sometimes I used to pass by his bedroom and hear the soothing notes of Charlie Parker...mixed in with some Li'l Wayne and Drake. His favorite trumpeter is Arturo Sandoval, he speaks Spanish and has a 3.1 gpa after his first year of college.

He can also play a mean trumpet. Here he is, home for summer break, playing an old trumpet that he'd left at the house. He has no sheet music and is just playing it wild.

He even raps under the name Li'l Budha.

Happy 19th Birthday!

OLDBOY

I'm watching a movie called Old Boy. Has anyone else seen it? I've watched this movie over and over. The key is to wait a few years between viewings so that you can recreate the visual and emotional effect of it. Basically it is about an average man that is kidnapped and locked in a room for 15 years. And then he is just...released. They tell him he has 5 days to get revenge on them.

It's a Japanese film and is in the Revenge genre which is one of my favorites. I love all of the Japanese revenge stories. I've recently learned that OldBoy is a manga. It's also a part of a series along with Sympathy for Mr. Revenge and Sympathy for Mrs. Revenge. The latter might be hard for some as it deals with mutilation/torture. But under the circumstances of the story, it wasn't difficult for me to watch at all.

If you haven't seen OldBoy, it's on Netflex as an instant view. I highly recommend it. And unfortunately, as much as I'd love to discuss the end of the movie with people that have watched it--that can't happen because it would ruin it for others. But I'm pretty sure I cried and got sick at the same time. It is a happily ever after...sorta, in a twisted, deviant, creepy way.

Loved it!!!!

Tracy Morgan apologizes for anti-gay comedy rant

When I hear about things like this, I get this...squeamish feeling. I'm a true proponent of free speech AND against gay defamation. I'm also an ex-girlfriend of a stand up comic.

Morgan told an audience that if his son was gay he would pull out a knife and kill him. Not sure where the joke is since I only have that statement. But if that was a part of his bit then it really is no different than any other harmful, hateful, ill-thought out, commentary ridden, racist, bigoted, STUPID, comment that any stand-up comic can make.

And it all falls under freedom of speech/ expression.

However,when I was a kid, my favorite Aunt came to live with us for a while. Her name was Margot and she was 17 or 18. Margot was also born a man. I was five or six years old and would watch Margot put on makeup and transform from an awkward teenage boy into a gorgeous woman, and due to hormone injections and silicone shots, she was a very beautiful woman.

I did ask Margot why she dressed like a lady and she seemed surprised and tired all at once. She explained that she WAS a woman but it all got mixed up on the outside. I understood it perfectly. And there was born my acceptance of gays and probably my liberalism.

Several years later she would be murdered. I am not sure if she was murdered due to the fact that she was gay or not because the murderer was never found. As a matter of fact the police indicated that there would not be an investigation because it was probably some drug related murder. It was explained to us that's what usually happens when there is a violent death in the gay community.

What that really means is, 'Sorry for your luck, gays get picked on all the time, sometimes they die, how would we find the killer?'

Well, I just think that if society didn't think it was okay to de-humanize gays then maybe her death would have been treated like any other murder and investigated. Thankfully, that was several long years ago and times are changing. Homosexuality is much more acceptable. Kids are able to come out now while still in High School! Both my son and daughter have close friends that are gay and they don't even think about it!

On the other hand...Tracy Morgan is (I'm told) a comic. I'm not sure of this since his style causes me to cringe and I turn away anytime I see him. This is a practice that I would genuinely encourage others to engage in. It's so much better than trying to attempt to take away a person's human rights. Also, I'm not saying boycott him because he made a gay statement, either. I'm saying don't watch him because he sucks.

After having said all of that--I used to date a stand up comic. He talked about gays too. His nickname was the 'angry' comic so you can imagine some of the shit he'd say. He's a white guy that sometimes played in all-black clubs. And he would pull out his black jokes. I would tell him not to do a certain joke based on the crowd and he'd say he's doing it AND he'd kill!!! People ate that shit up! Mostly because he was...um FUNNY!

But I can't imagine him apologizing to anyone based on his act. In fact the only time he ever gave even a half-way apology is when he invited me to see one of his shows after we had just recently broke up. THEN when we get to the studio (because it was televised) he apologizes and says part of this act is about relationships. I'm thinking, payback for breaking up with him; this is going to f***king hurt. He didn't gouge me too bad, just talked about being DUMPED right before valentines day and how bad that sucked.

So, my position is this...Tracy Morgan can say whatever the hell he wants because--IT'S TRACY MORGAN! WHO REALLY CARES???

But when it comes to human rights there is also a fallout. I had it hit home with me several years ago when the Maplethorpe exhibit was banned from Cincinnati. I was one of the first people to talk about his rights to express his art...until it was finally allowed to be displayed and I saw with my own eyes. Then and there I decided to never fight for something that I hadn't educated myself about. I realized that I had just been fighting for the rights of a man to have a huge photograph of a little five year old girl, sitting on the stairs, holding a doll with her legs splayed open, and the focal point of the shot being her naked vagina.

There are no absolutes.

Cursing

I do curse a lot. But I know when NOT to curse. I don't curse as much in my writing as I do in my real life. At times I find myself writing Martier and she'll say shit and I'll go back and erase it because it's not something she would say, it's something I would say.

With that said, I want to introduce you to my older sister who writes under the name Mellow Yellow. If you've been following Vampiric Charms (a multi-member role play group that I write in) then you will see that Chapter 8 introduces a new writer; Mellow Yellow, who takes over the role of Jacinda. 

I had initially written Jacinda as a mellow, laid back professional along with her devoted husband Justin. Sissypoo took over the characters and the next thing I know Justin is acting like a crackhead. LOL! Well that's my sister. She's a good writer but she says fuck more times in one post than I do in all of my stories. Also, I think people are kind of scared of her. Anyways, she kind of got written out of the story by the other players but I believe she will attempt to re-emerge showing a 'softer' side.

Here is a peek at a portion of her post. 

..."Well for fucks sake!" Carlisle grumbled. Justin looked up with listless eyes. His skin was ashen and his clothes rumpled. He'd been bled good. But he was alive. "Why the fuck didn't you call me, Justin? I waited all day! And you're just laying here looking like a...ghoul...

“Wha--? What--SHHH!” Justin jumped up fixing his crumpled clothes waving his hands.” SHHH man, Jacinda is resting!” He walked over to Carlisle still fixing his clothes and hair. “Man, I’m sorry I didn’t call, but your sister and I talked well into day break, I just lost track of time.” He stood looking at Carlisle trying to smile. “Man everything is alright, you see” stumbling over his words. “We talked, she’s OK, and you know I was concerned too, but after talking with her…Carlisle your sister is ok!”

Justin stumbled, trying to look normal, trying to regain his strength. He knew Carlisle was there to kill Jacinda, and probably him, he would not let that happen.

Justin begin rambling, not caring what Carlisle thought, “See, the reason I look like this, because after we talked we went to sleep and the reason she is in there, is because that was the only place for her to sleep comfortably and I slept on the floor so nothing would happen. You know Man, I know this looks weird, but everything is cool, so you can leave, NOW!” Justin was beginning to regain his strength; he no longer was smiling at his brother in law, he was glaring at him.

Damn, Carlisle thought. Justin is a ghoul. A ghoul was akin to a crackhead. A crackhead would do anything for that next rock and right now Jacinda was Justin’s rock. That meant that he couldn’t trust anything that would come out of the man’s mouth. He would lie, steal or kill for her.

“It’s cool, brother-in-law.” He said in a calm, even voice. He didn’t lower the gun though. “I’m just here to make sure that everything is ok. I see you’re cool. Now I just need to make sure my sister is.”
Justin began to pace as he continued to work at the wrinkles in his clothes. Carlisle wouldn’t take his eyes off the man. He would be stronger now that he’d drank from Jacinda. Technically he would be stronger then even him, and faster.

“We’re just going to wait here, until she rises, ok?” He calculated how long that would be. Twenty minutes? Forty?
Justin looked at Carlisle, as he scratched his head, ‘He’ll wait,’ he thought, ‘he’ll wait’. Justin’s mind began to wonder, then he became angry, ‘who the fuck does this little, thug ass motherfucker think he’s talking to? I just told him Jacinda is ok!’

Justin glared at Carlisle, and sarcastically said, “Damn man, what? You don’t trust me? Seems to me, it’s because of your Thug ass, we’re here anyway, “Fuck,” pause, “Fuck, Fuck, Fuck! Justin roared. “Who the fuck do you think you are?” he yelled, “My fucking wife is dead, her inside torn out through her COCK, you fucking shit head!” He laughed, “Mr. Carlisle Marlin, Hit man, Murderer, loving brother, and son, ha, what a fucking Joke!” he spit out the venoms words.

He looked at Carlisle, noticing the expression on his face, his jaw cracking, fist flexing. ‘Trying to punk me out, he thought. ’Fuck that little pea brain thug!’

“Bitch ass Ni.….” ’Naw, I want let the little prick take me there!’ “Motherfucker, you ran around playing Captain Save the Fucking World, but couldn’t even save your own fucking SISTER!” he yelled pounding his fist into his hand.

“Now my wife is lying in a fucking coffin, dead, but not dead man!” looking at Carlisle, while pointing to the coffin behind him. His eyes watering, he dropped his head, “You destroyed my family, was it worth it?”

Carlisle loosened his grip on the gun that he was squeezing in rage. He wanted to beat this man until there was no more life in his body. Or shoot him a few dozen times. Instead, he lowered the weapon. No one can stand with a gun poised to fire for longer than a few minutes. He was either going to shoot him, or was going to have to make a decision that he wasn’t.
He lowered the gun—but made ready to raise it if necessary. Also, Trey was still behind him and knew that his friend had his back if necessary.

With a sigh Carlisle relaxed. “Justin, hate me if you have to. I’m not going to even try to convince you not to. But if you don’t calm the fuck down I will knock you the fuck out.” His words were calm, he was even formulating 5 different ways that this would be done. He hoped Justin would get it. The jumpy ghoul was one step away from a royal ass whuppin!

Trey gestured. It was a silent signal but Carlisle understood it instantly. The werewolf had heard a movement.

The Vamps were rising...

The greatest fight scene

They Live

This is the quintessential fight scene! In my RP group; Vampiric Charms, there is a fight scene between Jeanne Pierre and Carlisle. They used this scene from They Live almost blow for blow. The response from the group was rather luke warm. I think predominantly we said...um you guys went overboard. LOL. But a very good scene. And for those that are reading Vampiric Charms thank you. The hits are building up! We have 9 followers and nearly a thousand hits. 

Here is a peek. In this scene, the human; Carlisle (written by AngelSCC) has just discovered that his murdered sister now walks among the undead as a ghoul. His brother-in-law (written by Silvious) is a werewolf. JP has been asked by his mate--Carlisle's sister to watch her brother even though the two hate each other. The ensuing fight was epic. Lol!

"...Carlisle tried to struggle out of the invisible werewolf’s grip. Jeanne Pierre’s grip was like steel.

“Let me go! That was Jacinda! I have to go to her!”

“WAIT!” Jean Pierre held onto the human as he struggled to break free like a rat caught in a trap, “Look you dumb son of a bitch, that wasn’t Jacinda! It was a ghoul! And ghouls travel in packs! Right now we need to go before either her pack gets here or the ancient vampire that was with them does.”

“Look man, if you don’t let me go and my sister gets away you better find yourself some place to hide and pray to god that I don’t find you!” Carlisle couldn’t get the picture out of his head of his sister carrying the half dead vampire over her shoulder. Jeanne Pierre had called her a ghoul. He tried harder to yank free. She was his SISTER!

“That’s not your sister,” Jean Pierre wanted dearly to just let the man go so that the ghoul and her kind would rip him limb from limb and slowly eat his flesh and drink the fluids from his body while he screamed out in shear agony, after all he deserved no less for getting his sister turned into such a foul creature but he had given his word to both Layla and Miika before he left that he wouldn’t let Carlisle die if he could prevent it, “Do you understand me?! That was not your sister and if you go after that ghoul your just gonna end up dead. No more Layla. No more Momma Marlin. No more Papa Marlin. Nothin… do you get that?!”

Carlisle paused. And then he stopped struggling. “let me go.” He muttered. The wolf released him and Carlisle glared over his shadow at the place where he would be standing if he wasn’t still wearing that damnable charm. Carlisle reached out and felt for where it should be then he yanked it off the wolf’s body and jammed it into his pocket. He headed out of the alley after his sister.

“Carlisle! You dumb son of a-“ Jeanne Pierre grabbed the man by his shoulder.

“Hey! You stay the way from me!” He yelled, pointing an angry finger at the man that still held on to his shoulder.

“You’re not going anywhere! I told you-”

“You crazy muther-“ His fist came up with the force of a freight train and landed on Jeanne Pierre’s chin. The wolf’s head rocked back momentarily.

Jean Pierre looked at Carlisle in disbelief for a moment before connecting with a solid right cross to Carlisle’s jaw. The human flew backwards, but Jean Pierre didn’t want to kill him… well he did but he was sworn not to, “Look, I’m giving you a choice; Either stay down or I’m gonna feed you that trash can.”

Carlisle came up to his feet slowly. “Not this year.” The two men circled each other slowly. Carlisle brought up his fist, preparing to block the next blow, or to keep this big bastard off of him.

“Okay.” Jeanne Pierre brought up his fist as well and Carlisle’s right fist darted out, landed on the wolf’s chin but it was the left hook that dropped the wolf. Jeanne Pierre came up on his feet. Carlisle should have known that he was faking because as soon as he swung again, Jeanne Pierre dodged and landed a hard shot to his ribs. Then with an unmatched speed his fist came up twice more landing square in the older man’s face.

Carlisle didn’t drop. “Fuck!” He screamed, feeling his jaw crack. He stayed stooped over, favoring his jaw.

“Stay down Carlisle.” Jeanne Pierre walked to him. Carlisle’s eyes caught sight of the sledge hammer. He reached for it and swung it at the wolf’s head. It struck him with a solid thud and Jeanne Pierre dropped.

Jean Pierre didn’t even realize what had hit him in the head as he lay on his back. He shook his head several times before he was able to prop himself up on his shoulders, “I told you; you better find a place to hide if you let my sister get away” Carlisle stepped forward and while holding the head of the sledge in his fist he used it to pack his fist as he pummeld Jean Pierre in the face once more sending him back to the concrete.

Slowly the lycan rolled to his knees and begn to push himself up, while Carlisle loomed over him. Jean Pierre took a weak shot for Carlisle’s crotch, “You dirty mother fucker!” the human growled before the lycan shot up and headbutted him, easilly crossing the human’s eyes and turning his legs to jello. Carlisle crumbled to the ground.

Jean Pierre watched as blood seaped from several open wounds in his brother in laws face. He reached down and grasped Carlisle’s hand and offered to pull him to his feet, “You through yet?”

Carlisle blinked his eyes and tried to clear his head as he grasped the offered hand. Jeanne Pierre pulled him to his feet. Carlisle’s hand was cracked but he threw a punch that was ineffective.

“You punch like a pussy!” Jeanne Pierre growled, not even flinching.

“I got your pussy-“ Carlisle drew up his knee sharply and connected solidly to his brother in law’s groin. The air left his body as he dropped to the ground, favoring his injured privates. Carlisle limped slowly out of the alley. His jaw, his fist…hell his entire body ached.

There was an animal growl from behind him and then a quick movement. Carlisle couldn’t believe that the wolf was barreling at him like a fucking linebacker! He hit his ribs driving them both to the ground before Jeanne Pierre gripped the man’s shirt front with his left hand and began driving his fist into Carlisle’s ribs with the right.

WHUMP!

WHUMP!

WHUMP!

Three times and then his fist smashed into his face knocking him against the adjacent brick wall. While he was against the wall Jeanne Pierre began pummeling with his massive fist. Carlisle struck out with his left fist and though he had a powerful left, he was not match for the pit fighter. Doing what he could, Carlisle gripped the big blonde by his head, anchoring him in place and attempting to drive his head into the wall. Instead Jeanne Pierre lifted him bodily and then fell backwards until the both of them slammed into the hard concrete ground.

Since he was on top and knowing that his nuts were already sore, Carlisle began to drive his knee repeatedly into the man’s groin. Each time hearing a satisfying Umph!

For a moment, all Jeanne Pierre could do was to cup his hands protectively between his legs. Carlisle stood, leaving him to writhe on the ground, instead the wolf locked his legs around Carlisle’s feet, sending him crashing to the ground yet again.

Panting and half out of breath, the two men dragged themselves to their feet. Jeanne Pierre was tired of playing with the human. He was going to knock him out! The two men circled each other, Carlisle surprising him when he dodged two of his punches. The third punch landed in the rear windshield of an abandoned car. Had he not been a werewolf that move would have broken his hand.

Carlisle reaches behind his back as Jean Pierre looks at him apologetically, “Look Carlisle I’m sorry about your sister. I really am. But what came through here tonight wasn’t her.” In one smooth motion Carlisle moved forward and swung in a tight arc, while pulling a switch blade from his back pocket. The knifes tip leapt free casing biting into the meat right below Jean Pierre’s left eye. Had the lycan been any slower he would have lost his eye.

Jean Pierre backed away and touched his cheek as his face slowly became a crimson mask. Carlisle moved towards him again and swung again for his face aiming for his eyes. A primal growl edged up from the depths of hell that lurked deep within the lycan’s soul as he reconized the burn that filtered through the cut on his cheek, “Silver.”

Carlisle swept the blade across Jean Pierre’s chest, adding one more scar to the mass that adorned his body from the pit fights. The two men began circling each other like a couple of lions readying for a kill. Though there was a distinct difference between the two killers; Carlisle was unleashing the beast in his soul. While Jean Pierre was trying to contain his for the sake of his love, Miika.

In an instant Carlisle sensed a moment of weakness from Jean Pierre, as the wolf reached out to his pack to help calm his anger, but as the knife knicked the skin at his side Jean Pierre grapsed Carlisle’s wrist and held it in place. He grabbed the man by the scruff of his shirt and hurled him down the alley into a metal trash bin. Leaving a deep impression of Carlisle’s body on the side of the heavy canister. Jean Pierre could hear the human gasping for breath as he stalked the alley towards him, “All you had to do was stay down,” he kicked a box of old rotted food out of his way, “but no. You play to all the stupid human steriotypes. We try are damndest to save your kind and are met with nothing but hostillity. Well, listen up you stupid fucker.” Jean Pierre picked up the knife before pinning Carlisle to the ground.

“Do you remember what I said I would do to you if you didn’t show me respect?” Jean Pierre reached down and grabbed Carlisle’s arm and bent it back at an awkward angle. Carlisle looked back at him in disbelief as he remembered Jean Pierre’s threat of making him a quadraplegic. A moment later agony ripped through Carlisle’s body causing him to black out as the last thing he felt was his arm being ripped from its socket..."

FB's day off

This is my favorite scene from Ferris Bueller's day off. Yesterday my daughter and I were talking about existentialism as it relates to this scene. Yeah...having me as a mother is a unique experience. This scene has always touched me deeply. When I look into Cameron's eyes I see myself...my own thought process. Even before I knew what John Hughes thought as he wrote the scene I felt something similar; I felt as if each little dot within the painting meant nothing on it's own. Cameron looks at the little girl and the closer he looks the less he sees. There is nothing there and that is what he sees when he looks at himself.

I actually named my son after one of the characters purely because of this scene. I did not name him Ferris.